"Cry Havoc! And let slip the balls of war!" ~ a kinda quote from "Billy 'His pen is big' Shakespeare". This was our duly noted shout as we took on, “Pitch Please” this last Thursday as we sought redemption, victory and a wide assortment of Girl Scout Cookies. Did we achieve our many'd goals? Is many'd even a word? Read on dear reader for if you do.. you shall discover our tale of a tail found upon the end of a whale.
The mosquitos were out in force. They bit, they hummed, they asked us to fill out petitions for human rights, and we duly applied Michelle's "Organic" bug spray that left us smelling Eucalyptus fresh and kept most of the 'sqeetos at bay. “Pitch Please”, in their light blue tops, were on the field. They had a pitcher, a ginger, who was mad (like the Hatter, but feverishly avoids beaches and sand volleyball courts) and tried to be intimidating. But, have you seen a ginger try to be intimidating? It's like watching a wet kitten yearning to be fierce.
The kicking began and this humble, and gun showing, author got to first. Michelle "Eucalyptus skins" got a clever bunt in to have us at 1st and 2nd. Then Matt "Big Baller G" came up and kicked a nice one to right, scoring myself and Michelle.
Nate "short hair, don't care" took the mound and swiftly got a double play and Mike, "Outfield ain't got shit on me" caught a nice deep kick out to center.
On the foots again, newcomers Phil "I might be the nicest dude alive" and his lady friend Mel "Yea, I know Phil!" came up to kick. The mad pitcher, threw his mightiest, which again, was like a wet kitten trying to scowl, but Mel got a nice kick and went to first. Then Phil came up and deep balled it, as Mel says he often does, getting a homerun scoring Mel (Almost had to pick her up by 3rd base). Yes!
Nate was on base and slid masterfully into second, then into third, eventually scoring. I was again on base, ditto for Michelle and in wicked Deja Vu.. Matt kicked another to right, scoring this fella. Nando was on first but didn't tag up. I believe he was distracted... with thoughts of "How is it that Ryan "The Author" can high five so accurately, yet with fierceness not seen since kittens?" and "what's his deal with kittens anyway?" and thus creating a double play.
Our cunning ways continued on the defense; in the field Matt "Stretchy Palms" got a great catch at third and Jolene "Bobbles on Boobs" was in deep center left, ball coming in from a high arc.. it hits her in the chest, bounces, then bounces off her outstretched arms, then bounces into her mighty, yet delicate, grasp for a well done out!
To Glory! To Balls! To Darby’s!