Charity Chair Update

Hey Party People!

Hope you are loving kickball as we are half way through the season!

Let’s take a quiz! The goal of kickball is to:

A.    Live out your childhood fantasies of being a professional kickball player on a ridiculously competitive team until you blow out your ACL (oops, I think I might be confusing softball with kickball)

B.     Have fun! It involves the “warm” summer weather, beer, buddies, and just enough aggression to take the edge off so you can make it just one more day of the work week without one of your coworkers suffering a tragic (yet accidental, of course) injury

C.     Allow you to tell your super awesome kickball stories at lunch the next day, and in the process of laughing so hard at your team’s inside jokes and antics, you start choking on your sammich as the rest of the people at your table just kind of give you awkward shifty eyes (hopefully a few give you a sympathy laugh)

D.    Impress girls/boys/girls and boys

E.     All of the above

To be honest, I think all the options are correct. But regardless of your reasons for playing kickball, I think I know how to step up your game to succeed in those goals: BUY JELL-O SHOTS! It’s that easy. No steps 1,2, and 3, just one dollar, one shot, and one dream.  

So if you see us charity ladies making the rounds, don’t run away, don’t hide, don’t ignore us, and don’t pretend you spent all your dollars on Chastity and Cherry last night. Instead, buy a shot! (Maybe also give us a drink…shout out to the team that gave me champagne last week. Holla!)

In other news, keep an eye out for the Barrow-o-Booze! We’ll be selling raffle tickets and raffling it off at playoffs, and trust me, you want it! Not only do you get a ton of liquor, wine, and beer, but you also get a wheelbarrow for your friends to take you home in at the end of the night. A twofer!

Remember, all proceeds go to our charity of the season, Make a Wish Minnesota! Do it!

Charity Update

Do you want the good news or the bad news first? Okay, bad.

A rando drunk person tried to take over kickball on Thursday! I know, some of you are probably texting your friends asking exactly what happened on Thursday, but unless your master plans included calling the president to protest (Amanda Bynes, is that you?) and stealing a bunch of watches, I don't think it was you. Thank goodness for the Kicklord Johnson stepping up to the plate (get it? kickball reference) and protecting all his subjects from chaos and thievery. But that's not the bad news. Due to the disturbance, cold weather, and this girl being in high demand to fill in for missing ladies from other teams, the original Jell-O shot plan got mildly derailed.

The good news you ask? The Chairty Chairs will have Jell-O shots for sale this week! It's supposed to be nearly 80 (finally, no?) and I sure can't think of anything that quenches your thirst more than a Jell-O shot! So as always, bring dollars to the field, and let's celebrate the actual start of Spring League! Woo! Warm weather and shots for a dolla, holla!

Kickball Charity Update!

Big news! Our charity this season is…… drum roll please……

Make a Wish Minnesota! 

That’s right, we all are lucky enough to be able to live out our dreams of being a professional (kick) baller, and now we’ll be able to make it possible for someone else to fulfill their wish! What luck! We killed it during Fall season for our charity, but I’m determined to top last season’s funds raised.

Here's HOW:

1.      Bring cash to the field! We’ll have shots, boozy freezies, and who knows what else for sale at the field on game day. Don’t be that kid that misses out.

2.      Bring cash to the field! What’s better than booze? A wheel 'barrow-o-booze! This season we will be raffling off a (you guessed it) wheel barrow full of booze, beer, and bar swag. Buy tickets, buy often. You’ll be the most popular person in the league once you win. [A visual representation of said 'barrow-o-booze is below for convenience!]

3.      Come to the bar (probably should bring cash for that too)! Not only is Whisky Park awesome by itself, but we’ll have fun games and challenges you can participate in each week, and oh, I don’t know, give to charity at the same time!

To review: grant wishes, bring cash, get drunk, PROFIT! Pretty easy, right?